After a day or two and 10 more hours of working, I had a call from one of the guys from the house I got kicked out. Come home so you can sleep properly, nobody is gonna say anything anyway. I was extremely curious why the universe was so good to me. I decided to not really think about it and once again ''Enjoy the moment''. At last I had some warmth and a bed to sleep. I know it wasn't a long time but for someone who was never homeless, being able to sleep properly was just fucking great. Once again, I slept quite nice. I say that because usually I really can't sleep. My mind works overtime for no reason and I just think and think and think. I also had wi-fi which was cool.
More and more shifts came on my way and I was really gratefull for the support I had from the guys in the house. Now you gonna say: But Nick, aren't they your muse? Well you could say that but I always imagined a muse as something more longterm and lets be honest here. This is short-term. I wasn't gonna live in this house rent free for more than 2 weeks. Despite that, I was extremely gratefull. At some point I was working from 3pm to 5am. Crazy, just crazy. I loved it. Stupid clients throwing bread at me while I was serving another table, cheesecakes all over the place, lost phones and wallets in the aftermath. I- L-O-V-E-D I-T.
A girl asked if I was enjoying my self being a waiter and all and when I replied yes she was like..''Nah, you don't''. 'Yes I fucking am you spoiled brat'', I wanted to say. Yet, I had to smile like a charming homeless gentleman I am and say Of course, I love my job. Which is actually true.We had a 30 minute break at some point and they said that we could eat food. FOOD! Like, you know fucking food and stuff. So I took and plate and I was like
I ate so fucking much that made me question my humanity. Am i a fucking sin? Am I gluttony in the flesh? ''Enjoy the moment'', my subconcious mind shouted so I just kept eating. Then I actually had a diet soda because that's all they had in the bar. The shift ended and my feet hurt more than Johny Cash's song. Yes..the Hurt one. Duh. However, I was feeling that the night was still young even though it was not night because it was 5am. So I just went back at the house to get some sleep despite the fact I was so excited.
I took a shower and would you look at that. My feet are bleeding. Seemed like the whole work everyday, party never thing was taking a toll. It hurt when I walked so that was the point I decided to take a 2 day break from work, not because I didn't want to work but for the exact opposite. I neded money and to achieve that I really had to work. So I had to balance work and healing my feet. I went slowly to bed while shouting ouch in each step I took and slept. I woke up the next day with the sun shining bright in my face again as my room never had blinds. Moral of the story: Get blinds.
Just kidding. The whole work thing made me forget all the bad things. Enjoying the moment actually made me enjoy my whole life. With all the bad and the good including. Mostly bad but who cares. I found out that words are quite cheap. Maybe I am wrong. I wish I am actually. However, thats my opinion on this matter. All I could hear was, I'll be there for you, If you want to talk to me just message me. Like...What the actual fuck? People should record themselves when they say things like that. Just to replay them again at some point and see how idiotic and pretentious they seem. What should I talk about to someone who I broke up with? Like, ''hi there I just wanted to message you because I feel lonely. I wish we never broke up and I want you here by my side. Ok, have a nice day now love". I don't know if I should laugh or cry when people say things like that. Make your own muse. Be independent. Stop overthinking and giving a damn about people who will say I'll be there for you yet they abandon you. Enjoy every moment, every single one of them. Smile more. Even when something bad happens. Just-smile. We have no power over some things. No control, no button to make it work, reset or rewind. There is no time manipulation superpowers to fix our mistakes. So, enjoy every moment and hope for a brighter tomorrow. Hope the sun will still be there radiating in your face, waking you up with its gentle heat.
Moral of the story: Enjoy everything, smile and everything is gonna be fine.
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